I think I can, I think I can…

What a day, what a week! I had a busy, busy 72-,96-, I’ve-lost-count- hours or so. I was up all night Tuesday and did not sleep until Wednesday evening. It was a terrible nights sleep. I felt pretty crummy all day Thursday, even after a short nap. Then I went to work my overnight shift.

So why am I quoting Thomas the tank engine, you ask? Well, I am have about 2 1/2 hours left of my (aforementioned) overnight shift and about 1/2 hour drive home. I think I can make to my bed before I pass out from exhaustion. Okay, so maybe I am being a little dramatic. I will not “pass out from exhaustion” but I am sleepy and I want a nap. Wah!

But enough about that.

Today, (technically yesterday afternoon), was my first day of class for Drawing 1. I had my doubts about this class: the professor was not given the best of reviews by someone I know; I also am pretty certain I had anxiety attacks the last time I took studio art classes a few years ago – I am not trying to repeat that episode-; I wasn’t feeling too well all day; and I was just plain nervous.

I am glad I went to class. The professor seems nice and acceptably demented (he is an ARTIST/TEACHER after all, some screws have to be loose to stay “FUNctional”). The assignments seem “doable”. I am neither the best, nor the worst artist in the class. It may sound weird, but being mediocre is a good place to start because there is least amount of pressure to perform than either of the extremes (extremely good/extremely bad). Also being mediocre allows you to space to grow over the course of the classes without feeling like a complete loser for utterly sucking at something. That’s how I see it.

I think I can:
make it through this shift;
safely get home and go to bed,
recover from my busy schedule;
survive Drawing 1;
forgive myself for producing imperfect artwork;
grow as an artist;
become a more well-adjusted with my new outlet.

❤ A ❤


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